I’ve been thinking about how different people are, even those who come from the same parents. I e-mailed my last blog post to my sister about the wild morning after the concert, the night she disappeared with one of the band members. I raced my father to motel the next morning, who was ready to find her at all costs. In reality, the only person in danger that morning was my Dad, who was ready to take on anyone who stood in his way. Knowing what he was capable of, I know I got there just in time. However, everyone understood the situation; a father with a missing daughter is probably the most dangerous creatures on earth.
My younger sister (now 60) and I have been e-mailing each other about this event. I wasn’t sure what she’d think:
That is awesome! I have blocked out all those horrifying details except for one and that is that nothing did happen, but talk. I left mom and dad a note saying i came home and left again but they said they didn’t see it. Maybe they just didn’t care and figured I could be in trouble. Who knows. It’s crazy now from the perspective of a parent how I see both sides.
Thanks for always being there for me and especially that time!!
I’m glad I was there too. I’m also glad she enjoyed reading my post.
This was the first time I’ve heard about any note left behind. My sister has an excellent memory, but it does seem that she may have actually blocked out some of the “horrifying details”. However, she informed me that she still has the stage pass from that night. Too bad she didn’t save the note! It’s been at least forty years, so she must at least have some good connection to that day.
I never discussed that morning’s scene again with either parent. I’m sure my sister’s own family knows nothing about this either. On the other hand, my haphazard life has been an open book to both my wife and kids. I asked, and both my girls remember hearing all about it. They may know more about it than my sister does at this point.
I made a decision early in my children’s lives that I would never lie to them. I admit, there were times when I changed the subject or gave out only the bits and pieces I thought they could handle. Many people might disagree with my methods, but I feel that this policy of honesty has paid off. Both of my daughters grew up to be better people than me, which is exactly what I had hoped for. I’ve made a lot of good decisions in my life, and yes, plenty of not-so-good ones as well. I believe that sharing my cautionary tales paid off. Plus, they both trust me to tell it like it is. And they know that I will! I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Nowadays, unlike my sister, I hold back very little, but I don’t question her choice to keep things to herself. It seems very strange to me to be reminding her of the concert events, knowing that I probably remember it all more clearly than she does. I actually treasure these memories; she has, to some extent, pushed them away. I’m happy to serve as the one thorn in her side, bringing it back to reality, and possibly as the only one who knows the real her.